The Second Date

Being that FFD was the 17th guy I've "shidduch dated", I felt that the date wasn't horrible like I've had in the past. I mean...I managed to carry-on a conversation for 6 hours!! How bad could that be!!

I wanted to go on a second date, but I had no idea what he was thinking. Was he going to call me on his own? Was he going to take the easy way out and IM me? Were we going back to the shadchanim(which are every single one of our friends...JK!)? I had no idea what to do. FFD says that I IMed him after the first date. I really don't remember that, but it's possible that happened. Whatever it was, we did not go back to the shadchanim and took everything into our own hands.

(Because I don't have as much details as FFD, I will go on and continue with date #2 and so on and he'll fill you in on his side)...

Our 2nd date was on a Motzei Shabbos. (Note: First date was Wednesday Feb. 22, 2006). The plan was to go to My Most Favorite Dessert in the city. After driving around and around, with me keeping my mouth shut because he "knew" where he was going...there was no parking spot to be found. We ended up going to J2. I was OK with that. [Some other guy took me for pizza on a 2nd date and I didn't think it was the right thing to do, but the situation was very different.] We sat and shmoozed for awhile until we got kicked out because the store was closing. That was about 1:30 AM or so. FFD recently reminded me that the "real" serious conversation took place on the 2nd date. I thought the date went well. I really didn't have any complaints(other people may remind me of how I felt, but as far as I remember B'H all was good). This date lasted about 5 1/2 to 6 hours long.[FFD didn't realize this was a good thing]!

I don't remember what happened between the 2nd and 3rd dates(besides shmoozing online) but I will give FFD time to catch up with his side until this point.

My Side of the Story

Hello Everyone!

FFD was so kind enough to allow me to post on his blog!! Isn't he the best!!! Well ladies and gentelmen...this blog is now OURS!! If I get addicted to this, someone please stop me!!

Let the fun begin....

When I was first told about FFD, I had my usual simple questions(where he went to school, what's he like, etc). All great answers especially since I knew we had a bunch of friends in common so I thought it would be so nice if it worked out!! Anyway, once I heard I was the first girl he went out with, I then got a little nervous. In the past, I haven't had much luck with me being the guys' first. So I was contiplating back and forth ab out what to do. I finally said to myself, everything sounds great, why not just give it a shot.

So at the first phonecall, I was trying to be nice and understanding because the guy at the other end of the phone was nervous as anything(he told me on the spot which I thought was quite humerous and blunt). But, I dealt with it calmly and just tried to ween him into the dating world slowly. I was able to tell that FFD had(and still has) a sense of humor and I was able to carry on great conversations with him whether it be over the phone or IM.

THE DATE:

Unlike FFD, I was not as nervous. Even after going out with a bunch of guys and have had my share of experiences in the dating world, I was still a drop nervous. I guess FFD is right (which doesn't happen SO often) that girls usually get very nervous because they don't know what the guy is going to look like. Well, at least that's what it is for me and usually after seeing the guy, I'm totally myself and carry on with the date.

Unfortunatly, I do not remember the specific details of each of our dates, but I will jump ahead (of FFD in his post) and say that going to Jillians is not the best place for a first date. I thought it would be fun, it's the place to go and I've been there many times(which I didn't realize that I'd be a drop bored after a few minutes). Afterall, I beat FFD in b-ball so where was the fun after that?! I was MVP on my high school b-ball team(ok so for those who know me, I'm SO not a b-ball player). I made that comment on our first date as a joke and FFD was silly enough to believe me(which he had no real reason not to!)

After Jillians, we went to eat at King David in Cedarhurst. I thought it went well. But on a first date, you don't get SO excited because you don't want to get your hopes up. After dinner, we sat and shmoozed in the car in the parking lot across the street. He then dropped me off at home and I just waited to see what was going to happen.

All in all the date was 6 hours long(my longest date ever)!!!

More to come....

Hello And Welcome

To all of you first time visitors WELCOME.
I am just a simple guy who has no real focal point to his blog but when I feel like it i do like to blog about my dating experience. I went out with only one girl (yes I do know how lucky I am and thank the K"BH every day) who will BE"H be my FFW (Frum Future Wife) in Dec. To get an understanding of what I am up to in the dating story please see these back links.

http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/brief-history-of-our-time-i.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/my-dating-story-continues.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/very-first-call.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/second-first-call.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/until-we-speak-againnext-tue.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/second-second-call.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/no-turning-back.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/05/first-sight.html
http://frumdoc.blogspot.com/2006/06/jillians.html

Jillian's

We are on our way and the car ride has begun. There is some idle chatter which I guess is to be expected on a first date. We reach our first traffic light and before I get there it turns yellow. My mind, ever the exuberant marathon runner, is telling me a thousand things at once. But right now it’s wondering do we gun it or stop cautiously. Being a native New Yorker I know this light will turn red in oh only about 1.4 seconds. I am on a first date why not take the cautious route I think to myself. We approach the light and I decide to stop. The car comes to a complete halt and I look up…the light is still yellow. I begin to wonder if she noticed she had to have. I think the light stayed yellow just long enough to feel like a complete doof, which for your information is 4.6 seconds.

The light turns green and we are on our way. I have no idea where I’m going and this is a position I hate to be in. Not only do I have to deal with keeping up a conversation while driving on my very first date, I don’t know where I’m heading. I visualize making a wrong turn and ending up in the “seedy” part of town. I look like the perfect little preppy kid. If I were a carjacker lookin for a joy ride I’de carjack me. She tells me we have to go straight for a long while as she continues her story about how impressed she was with her class that day. (FFW is an assistant 1^st grade teacher). I’m not really listening I just know I’m supposed to go straight.

Then Error number two rears its ugly head (or this could just be her giving me some lip….you decide). We are going for quite some time when I ask, in a very unassuming manner, “so how much longer until we get there” to which FFW responds “am I boring you that much that you want to get rid of me already”…ouch. I’ve just been filleted, grilled, chewed and spit out. In fact that piece of meat would be better than me because at least it’s over with I still have to finish this date.

The rest of the car ride goes as best as could be expected. Except for almost missing one bearing left which I wasn’t told about (so much for just going straight), and we arrive in the parking lot at Jillians. I am driving my Dad’s 2001 nissan sentra with power lights (they are powered by the battery) and automatic accelorator (the car goes automatically if you hit the gas) everything else needs to either be cranked, pulled or clicked. She doesn’t lock the door, so I reach over and click it shut. (I will be doing this for the next 14 weeks).

Jillian’s is not such a large place with arcades all over the place. It’s like a casino for non-gamblers but ur givin your money away all the same. We walk in and head to the assistance/greeting counter. There are more bells and lights going off than at a Saturdy Night Fever dance off. I tell her I have no idea what im doing and she tells me that you have to buy a card to play all of the games. I say OK and tell the good man to put 20 bucks on the card. She asks me if I’m sure and suggests maybe putting on 15 dollars. I look back at the sign and realize we get more credits per buck with the 20 and stick with the 20.

I hand her the card and ask her what she would like to do as she walks straight to the air hockey table. I admit it seems like fun and we slide the card to get the puck.. We place our coats on the bar stool they have there and get ready. The air turns on and we begin our fun in a world without friction. Why is it called air hockey anyway? The premise is the same as soccer or football maybe it should be air soccer or air football (ovaltine). And even if you tell me because it uses a flat puck still, if a miniature game of soccer can get named foosball a miniature game of hockey can get its own name too (hooky?)…anyway I digress. I place the puck down and smack it, it come right back to me. I hit if off the side and score a goal. Not bad I think but don’t get to cocky it may just be beginners luck. I score two more points and am starting to think I should hold back a little. So I simply tap it now hoping she’ll score a goal. NO LUCK she just scores me two more. This is going to be harder (easier) than I thought. She leans forward and places her arm over her goal as if to block my next shot…was that a joke; an attempt at humor I BELIEVE IT WAS. She scores me another goal and I promise im still trying..Im soo not. Im beginning to think maybe shes living like three seconds in the past because her shots at the puck seems to be exactly where it was the moment before. Or maybe she sees another puck? Who know but I win and she gives me a congradulations.

“What next” I say hoping that there is something here that she would be relatively good at. A driving game catches my eye as we walk past it. “Why not this”. We swipe the card and start our engines. I let her win…What next...we play something else…what next…etc. you get the idea. This is not fun at all. I don’t know her I don’t have a chance to talk to her and I’m beginning to see that she thinks I’m more boring than Ben Stein in those stupid clear eyes commercials (or the wonder years take ur pick). I try to ask a question but she laughs in my face (see earlier this isn’t the first time). I explain that im seriously interested in what im asking and im not just asking it because it’s one of those questions everyone asks on a first date (I may have been though not sure).

We walk over to ski ball and win some tickets. We walk over to the hit the button when the bulb lights up and get some more. We walk over to the basketball hoops and let her beat me…this feels like a weird twilight zone episode. You are in an amazingly fun place but we are cursed to be dull and subdued. She tells me she was on her high school basketball team and that’s why she won. Finally something interesting! Oh really I say as I perk up ready to show her whose boss. “why don’t we go once more”. We do and I whoop her worse than the globetrotters do a high school basketball team. That WAS fun. (to be cont.)

A real Shock

It is 2:50 am and I can't sleep because in little more than 4 hours my good friend Chayim Yehudah will be undergoing open heart surgery. It is nerve wracking even though I know there is a 96% chance he will leave the hospital healthy having had a Doctor open his chest cut out his aortic valve and replace it with a mechanical one. I know this has nothing to do with what I am about to blog about but I hope you understand that it is simply what is on my mind.

Application rant

I apologize profusely for the lack of any form of significant post in the past few weeks but finals have come and gone and now I have but one 5 page paper (out of 11 at the start of the semester YES 11) standing in the way of my eventual graduation. I feel more prolific than Isaac Asimov (who wrote or edited more than 500 works in his lifetime). Anyway since this blog was created not as a dating History of myself and the FFW, but as a cathartic expunging of all that the medical school life entails I will blog for a bit about that and return very soon and finally blog tell you all how I came to appreciate and love FFW.

Well as you all know I took my MCATs in August of 05’ and B”H I did relatively well. But as anyone who has gone through it can tell you the MCATs are only the number you wear on your chest in the marathon that is the Medical School application. I took the august MCAT with full intention of NOT applying for the entering class of 05’. I wanted to stay ahead of the game and decided to hold off for a year which provided me with a number of opportunities.

1) I could take a year off and find a research opportunity that would further boost my application to medical school by demonstrating a commitment to all thing medical and science related.

2) I would be first out of the starting gates for my medical school application.

And so I went my merry way assuming that all would fall into place, and for the most part it really did. I had a research opportunity lined up in a prestigious lab in Einstein. This position, however, was non-paid.

Then it happened! My life changed the single instant I decided to go out with FFW. Non-paid no longer cut the mustard, actually it couldn’t even supply the mustard to cut, but B”H I am in no way complaining. I mean I found the (only) individual I wish to spend the rest of my life with so I guess I didn’t do so bad (I know PUKE to all you married couples :-P).

Anyway desperate times now called for desperate measures and I began to dust off the old resumé. Updating, restructuring, and reformatting, I did the best I could to make my resumé appealing to the widest range of possible employers. And so I began applying here, there and everywhere but nothing came. Nothing at all! So I posted the resume on monster then on NYT job market, then carrerbuilder then I went to individual university web pages and posted it there.

p.s. Im still looking for a job

Im so dead

I was just thinking i could get you all to sound off maybe on what you think is nice

PLEASE COMMENT ON WHICH YOU LIKE BETTER!

The flower has The Gimmel, Bet and Yud but no Mem